January 14, 2016
"Hi, my name is Saul the Largest StickerBall but you can call me, Mr. POWERBALL."
Saul has hit a lucky streak. He has become a national icon and is recognized while out and about on the streets by strangers. Yesterday, Saul was officially weighed in as the World's Largest Sticker Ball for a Guinness World Record. He hit a final weight of 231.6 pounds and 171,644 stickers on him. What could beat that?
Well, Saul was feeling good yesterday afternoon and played the numbers 17-1-6-4-23 and Powerball 16 which was a combination of his weight and final count of stickers on him. Saul told the stressed out gas station clerk glued to their Lottery terminal, "I am, Mr. PowerBall." Given his intimidating "ballish" demeanor, the clerk believed him.
Saul went home and started going through ideas to do with the winnings:
"I could get a Sticker Manicure in the morning, so I really shine for my fans."
"Buy every sticker in Colorado and slap them on, to really bulk up for 2016."
"Make a castle out of stickers to really feel at home."
"Go see Star Wars and imagine being BB-8 for the 10th time."
Well, when the lottery balls started dropping out of the machine last night, Saul's lucky streak officially ended. Like many Americans today, Saul rolled back to work to continue his simple existence as part of cog in the business machine here at StickerGiant.
Cheer up, Saul. You are still a World Record Holder.
What do you think Saul should have done with the Powerball winnings?
